No relationship is every constant. Just like the world which is constantly changing and evolving, relationships too go through constant change. Some relationships are volatile owing to the nature of both the partners who may be too hot headed. Some others are likely to be plain and simple and have no spice at all. Each relationship is characterized by the mental makeup and emotional behavior pattern of the individuals.
Many people tend to place the blame easily on the woman whenever a relationship goes through challenges. Women are no doubt emotionally vulnerable. However it takes hands to clap. Similarly men have emotional problems and behavioral issues too. In fact women tend to verbalize and bring out their problems and unburden themselves, whereas men are generally prone to burying their feelings and pains within themselves. Any unresolved issue that causes pain, anxiety or suffering does not go away even after a number of years. The negative feelings influence the thinking pattern of the individual and shape his responses to similar situations and to his environment.
Children in childhood are many times exposed to a lot of emotional distress, abuse and horrifying situations which leave a impact on their minds. This is true in case of girls as well as boys. In the case of boys however, the tendency to bury their feelings and not bring it out to the open builds up mental tendencies that shape their behavior when they grow up. Insecurities in childhood tends to push boys towards taking to alcohol, drugs and smoking etc and seek out wrong company. When boys grow up with insecurities and problems, their outlook towards their relationship and their behavior towards the spouse or partner in the relationship is colored by their inner feelings that have been pent up and unresolved.
If a man is abusive towards his partner, the root cause could lie in his childhood experiences. Men who do not take responsibilities for their families and do not provide for their families are the one's who would have seen similar behavior pattern in their parents or some close relative in their childhood. Some negative feelings towards themselves or towards the others in the family could prompt them to shut off from the reality and not own up their responsibilities. In many cases their perception of themselves and their identities could be very low causing them to adopt aggressive behavior or un natural behavior outside.
As in the case of women, the emotional problems faced by men calls for psychiatric and psychological treatment and counseling. In most cases the couples are often unable to recognize the root problem from the external behavior and hence the actual problem of the emotional health of the person does not get addressed. When the relationship breaks down or is beyond repair is the time when they are likely to be prepared to approach a counselor and seek treatment.
Because men are not forthcoming by nature, it becomes important for them to be aware of their emotional health and seek professional help. The wellbeing of the spouse and the family depends largely upon the wellbeing of the man and his emotional wellbeing.